Gifts: More than Ribbons and Bows

I never believed him when he said I had a talent for art.  Now, I may never hear him say that to me again.

Mr. and Mrs. Powell, my "adopted" grandparents

The sheer amount of things I learned from this man is immeasurable.  He helped teach me how to get along with my sisters, he was an influence in teaching me about hard work, he enhanced my appreciation for creating and consuming good food, he refined my knowledge of patience, he helped nourish my love for Christ, he encouraged me to dream, he was my example for continuous learning, and (most precious to me)
he taught me how to paint.

He is a grandfather to me and he loves me like I am his own.  But now he needs me to remind him who I am; I can hear my heart break as it aches for days gone by.

Sitting down to work on a newfound form of art for me, Photoshop and Illustrator, I found myself thinking about how much he would love to see what I've been working on.  He would be so proud of me and it would bring a new dynamic to our conversation.  I could show him the logo I've designed for myself, remembering the importance he always put on signing my work.

Then I'd sit and chat with him about how life continues to change.  I'd share my adventures at State, the new opportunities in Event Planning that have come my way, and the man the Lord has brought my way and how much I love him.

While I can talk with him and share all these things, to me it will never be the same.  I'm reminded by his sweet wife that this is where faith comes in; faith that God's got it all under control when it feels like everything is crumbling to pieces.

My Lighthouse

I loved painting with him.  I loved the music he played from back in the 50s and 60s; swing and Sinatra.  I loved the mixing of colors, stepping back and looking at the progress, his gentle guidance and encouragement.

Now, I'm afraid to paint without him.  I'm afraid that his guidance was the secret ingredient that made him want to show everyone my artwork.  The thought that my next painting will be an utter failure scares me into a petrified state.  He believes I have a gift and a talent, but I'm afraid to prove him right.

Father, thank you for always believing in me, even when I don't believe in myself.  Thank you for giving me the capacity to feel passion and remember the good times.  Thank you for how you have used Mr. and Mrs. Powell in my life, please bless them beyond their wildest dreams.  Please continue to comfort Mrs. Powell and their loved ones.  Thank you for my mom and her servant-like heart.  Please help me to use the talents you have blessed me with to speak of your glory.  Thank you for how you have blessed me, may I never take it for granted.  How I love you.